Monday, 4 May 2009



Zach Orji’s A Faithful Husband
THERE is one distinctive thing about Nollywood star, Zach Orji; whereever you saw Uncle Zach, just look closely, there is aunty Ngozi, his wife. Hardly will you see the actor without the wife. In fact, when most Nollywood stars will decide to take ‘handbags’ along to many occasions, Zach flaunts his wife. However, some of his colleagues are no longer comfortable with Zach’s ‘behaviour’, they feel the actor’s wife is beginning to know too much about their escapades (truth is, most of them change ‘handbags’ like freebies) and this group of disgruntled Zach’s friends (I no call names o o o) were deep in a meeting at O’jez last week. Just as they arrived at a conclusion to confront him, in walked Zach and Ngozi, smiling and waving at everybody. In fact, you needed to see the face of the ‘conspirators’. Anyway, shame for bad people, whoever wan put asunda wetin God don join, Holy Ghost o o...

Yemi Sax’s ‘Identity Card’
THE saxophonist Yemi Sax, does not need to introduce himself anytime he walks into a crowded place. Aside from his trade mark dreadlocks, he now has another form of personal identification. In case somebody is about to take you in that he is Yemi Sax, just ask him to show you his left hand bicep, you will then be convinced he is either an impostor or the real saxophonist. But to help you in your task, this is a tip: what you will find on Yemi Sax’s left hand bicep? A bold tattoo with the wordings Yemi Sax inscribed in the middle of something (not sure what the tattoo actually looked like). See, the guy does not need a national ID card again, public note.

Daddy Monso... Lost But Found
NOLLYWOOD star, Daddy Monso, is missing in action. He just vanished from the entertainment horizon and all efforts aimed at finding out what caused the ‘sudden’ disappearance of the Ejike Asiegbu sideman, had until last week Wednesday, proved abortive. I was shocked to run into Monso at O’jez, sweating even with all the powerful air-conditioners turned on at high frequency. An investigation revealed why the actor was sweating like no man’s business. A bottle of a popular beer was sitting pretty in front of Monso, who was watching over a plate of the club’s ‘notorious’ peppered meat. Why im no go sweat for head like who dey kill meat dey sell for Mushin market? Since the actor declined comment on his whereabouts for close to a month, a detractor claimed Monso was so broke, he resorted to going to Winnis, where his brand of beer is sold for less the price at O’jez. “His economy has improved that is why he is here now. This stardom, you know it is a burden...” the detractor went on and on. Trust T4T, he confronted Daddy Monso with the ‘allegation’. In his reaction, he described the detractor as someone jealous of his ‘fortune’. Nice reaction. Anyway, if Monso disappears again, we now know why.

... And Diggity Dunhill Too
IT seems Nollywood fringe actor Digitty Dunhill has perfected Daddy Monso’s disappearing act. He has simply vanished. Oh, you don’t know Dunhill? Let me refresh your memory. It is the dreadlocks actor that T4T ‘claimed’ he saw inside his car near the artistes’ hangout at about 11pm, looking dazed (some say from alcoholic substances, others claimed it was from sleep). But then, he was looking for where to get fuel for his car that night. That is Dunhill. Now, he has vanished. Some people have been on his trail (as if im owe dem money). So many audition grounds have been searched, no Dunhill. His favourite corner at Winnis and O’jez, Dunhill has not visited for weeks. Well, we later learnt Dunhill lives in Igando surburb of Lagos; such that coming to Lagos every evening in the name of being a star has taken a toll on his pocket (he is a family man), so he discovered a joint close to his area where a bottle of beer sells for the same price like all ‘mama put’ beer parlour. And he is the only star there, so Dunhill is now a big fish in a small pond. No be me talk am o o, na im detractors.

Emeka Enyiocha’s Latest Babysitter In Town
SINCE he got married last December, Nollywood star Emeka Enyiocha, hardly hangs out now. Gone are the days Emmy Boy used to nearly pass the night at O’jez every Friday with his soul mate, Chidi Nwaekebia, a Nollywood producer. Since his wife gave birth to a baby girl, the situation is even worse. A close detractor claimed Emmy Boy is now the babysitter. So, while madam goes about preparing meal, the Nollywood star is always busy rocking the baby and cooing sweet things into her ear. Na now you go no say, to be a man is not a day job. Anyway, it is nice to be a (responsible) father for a change. But women, according to sources, consider you a lost sheep, who when it returns to the flock, the shepherd will be most happy. Recall that verse in the Bible? A word is enough for the wise.

Ras Kimono’s ‘Air-conditioned’ Car
RUB A DUB Master, Ras Kimono, saw hell in a typical Lagos traffic around Ikeja recently. Recall I told you when he was sighted at the Silverbird Cinema complex recently. Yes, this incident happened shortly after the sighting (as if Kimono na U F O). T4T was driving his tuke tuke besides a small looking SUV and instinct told him to look closely at the occupants of the car and behold, there sat our dear Kimono looking majestic in his reggae paraphernalia. As the traffic grew thicker, T4T noticed that Kimono was sweating (like Daddy Monso) yet the glasses of the car were all rolled up. The nickel dropped, the car the musician was travelling in had a faulty air-conditioning system. Kimono was ‘codedly’ using his handkerchief to wipe his face. Someone swore he saw him looked around stealthily before wiping his face. That peson wey carry Kimono na wicked peson, why im no kuku say the AC no dey wok make dem wind down the glass?

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